"The hardest of all is learning to be a well of affection,and not fountain,to show them that we love them,not when we feel like it,but when they do"

Tuesday, August 02, 2011

Excoriated Soul..

How does it feel to loose your soul? Difficult to answer cause rare ones have felt the existence of soul and some doubt of it being in reality within us.

It just vanished in thin air..there she laid her eyes wide open and she couldn’t say anything, nor move. Like a statue carved out of white marble, those delicate pink lips, deep blue eyes, and spectacular countenance. Time had frozen as she had wished so many times; everything turned cold –her body, mind, heart. The palpitation it stopped, her face was as if she was witnessing utmost calm and peace with a horror still prying her eyes.

One day back she had what she thought the most wonderful feeling of her life, something moved in her, she felt her heart rise with joy, her being drenched with togetherness .She placed her hand on his and he reverted back by putting his on her. Lying there together they had never ever thought that there could be something so wonderful in this whole-wide world. Though the shattering of the inner self of her wasn’t known to him and she bet it that the last blow would bring her down to pieces that could never be rejoined or regaled. Closing her eyes, she intertwined her fingers in his. They lay hugged with each other, she wanted to whisper something in his ears but her words have dried, tears trickled down her cheeks and she couldn’t understand whether it was of joy or of sorrow. She watched his face, it had taken a pale color but yet it seemed satiable, those closed eyes were showing calm, the breathe was signifying harmony. She brushed his hairs away from his eyes with one hand and with the other she caressed his back. His lips turned into a smile and he pulled her face close to his and kissed her lips. The night covered them in the dark aura of enchantment and seeming doubtless love. She watched him whole night sleeping and she was amazed by the fact still that this had happened with her.
Then by the time the sun had rise and his senses were getting ready to wake up ,she had closed her eyes with hands still tightly gripped together and the embrace the same way that it had been in the beginning.

Today she woke up and found herself lying all alone by herself on the bed and she didn’t knew what it meant. She got up afraid and insecure but she crossed her doubts and put up a smile across her face. As she searched all through the places wrapped in a blanket through the bedroom, drawing room, kitchen, balcony and then finally she reached the main entrance door to her house and there on the table by the side of the door laid a envelope. The door was ajar and she picked up the envelope, pulling out the piece of paper read the content

                     Yesterday evening and night was something I can never forget ever. I would remember it whole my life. It was a wonderful feeling to possess you inside me and talk with you for so long. I had not slept that way for a longtime and I was so relaxed after I had poured myself out to you. There were some secrets and some fears that I had let you know and I hope you would keep them all to yourself. Before meeting you yesterday evening I had not planned anything and I didn't have the slightest intentions to be like that with you. And I was aghast that I let that all happen. Today morning when I got up and realized what I had done to you and what you might have felt by it I was really ashamed of myself. But I didn’t regret it cause I feel there might be something good behind it. Don’t misinterpret me but I can’t be what I was to you yesterday, it was someone else in me and I am not that and as far as I know I can’t be that. I am leaving for my home today and I wish that we don’t keep in touch. The relation that I had shared with you was very beautiful and I might never come across such a relationship but trust me the reality of life is that whatever begins has to end too and I mean about this relation and this has to end, it has come to it’s end point. Have a blessed life ahead and I am not the one you seek for there might be someone who wants to never end but just be in the beginning with you and I am not that.

Yes dear all she was the undefined and he was the invincible. Invincible could not ever define her and Undefined could not ever conquer him. Separations happen to everyone but some are just unbearable and that was the final blow that was being feared and it broke her to pieces and there she lay like shattered pieces of glasses with lost identity and life. She lay there dead out of the sudden expulsion of realization after the dream that proved itself to be so and not reality.


Red Handed said...

as always beautiful piece..
you can do magic with ur words :)

Daydreamertoo said...

Oh that is sad. I feel as if he just used her for his own pleasure and then dumped her.
Good writing but, sad.

the other side of me said...

There you go..very nicely written

The first part was so beautiful and the second part was dark..

Maybe it has something to do with attach &detach :):),

Anyways,the emotions are there,carrying me till the end of the post..

..and I like the way you use the 'undefined' and 'invisible' word

Keep it up the good work

Love you
take care


cool yaar....
dat was another marvellous post from you...
really nice... :)

Raghu said...

wonderful.. agree with Red Handed here

L'Aussie said...

Hello Alcina. I came to say hi when I saw you'd followed Romantic Friday Writers. You have some beautiful prose and poetry here. I hope you are able to submit some of your work to our weekly blogfest when you can! You'd be most welcome!